In his book The Velvet Rage, Alan Downs writes:
“Velvet rage is the deep and abiding anger that results from growing up in an environment when I learn that who I am as a gay person is unacceptable, perhaps even unlovable,” he explains. “This anger pushes me at times to overcompensate and try to earn love and acceptance by being more, better, beautiful, more sexy – in short, to become something I believe will make me more acceptable and loved.”
“The roots of our trauma come from two primary places: our experiences of being a man in a hypermasculine society and our experiences of being gay in a straight world.”
This week, my buddy Curtis AKA Trillificent and I get into a discussion of what I call the Crushed Velvet Rage that melanated, same gender loving men of African descent experience.